Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Trying on New Dresses

Over the past year or so, I have come to think of my post-marriage behavior as akin to trying on new dresses, and seeing what fits, what is comfortable, what might be an interesting new way to live my life. Needless to say, not all the trials thus far have "looked so good on me".
(I'm not so sure the "Goddess" dress is quite right!)

With dating, I have been hellbent to "try on" men who are completely different from my former husband, as well as men who are a more familiar "fit". I don't want to assume I have a "type". Likewise with shoes and dresses. It's not that I am looking to be someone else, but I am trying to see if I have been limiting who I am comfortable with, what my experiences can be, and how I want to be dressed for different occasions.

I have been searching for summer dresses recently, and this exploration has played itself out quite literally. I have tried on - and purchased - a group of knit dresses and had an "is this me?" moment with each of them.
(This one is cute. Am I OK being cute? And can a woman my age wear something this length without looking like she's trying too hard?)

When I reached the last one on a recent search, it felt just right - like Goldilocks with her final bed.The dress was fitted and swingy, body conscious but not too-much so. It feels like home. It feels like I could wear it every day.

But the others feel like Goldilocks on a vacation, Goldilocks experiencing something new. And like vacations, they are not meant for every day necessarily, but they are part of my life for enjoyment and pleasure. Like new relationships, these dresses are worth trying on and seeing if they might be great new "home" options.

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